Wednesday, October 30, 2013

it's been real...(an update)

Oh my everyone. If I can tell you how much the Lord has been at work in the past two weeks, you wouldn't believe it. In every time I have said, "Lord, please help me. I can't do this by myself." He has provided in more ways then one. I am still speechless. When the assignments pile up and I'm planning literally every hour, The Lord will come before me and give me exactly what I need. The Lord is teaching me that it is not all about the academics! I have been thinking back to the initial reason I first wanted to go to bible college. I wanted a solid, and biblical foundation to hold the rest of my life upon. Wherever I go, whatever the Lord calls me to do for the future, I will walk upon the solid ground that Christ has set for me. With that being said, the past 2 months here at bible college have been crazy busy. With 22 credits, a job on campus, and everything else in between, I barely have time to breathe! I easily get so caught up in the deadlines, due dates, and academic success. That is not what it is about. How am I supposed to write a paper on the Holy Spirit if I'm not allowing Him to work in and through my life? This friends, is probably the most valuable lesson I have learned thus far. It's about my divine, romantic relationship with my Savior and drawing closer to Him at all costs. 

I LOVE fall guys. We are finally embracing the fall temps where I live and it is just fantastic. The past few days have been rainy, overcast and chilly. Time to break out the boots, jeans, scarfs, and sweaters! Love. Love. Love. 
This also means drinking as many hot drinks as possible. Why has no one informed me of the Carmel Apple Spice from Starbucks?! Life changing that drink is. Life changing. 

What?!!?! Me work out?! Preposterous. But indeed, your eyes aren't deceiving you. The other night I dragged my roommate to the gym and planted myself on the stationary bike. After 3 nights of this, I found that I had biked 13.35 miles! What. I had no idea that this was possible. Looks like someone is going to have to go shopping for some new workout wear!!

This picture brings me so much joy. Candid pictures are truly the best. Ariel and I truly have too much fun together. She has been my partner in crime ever since the very first days of school. She has an incredible heart for the Lord and challenges me to be a better follower of Christ. Moments like this are priceless. Sitting outside our room, playing guitar, singing, and just being sisters. It is the best to live with the people that I do and I wouldn't trade them for anything. 

"To me, a lady is not frilly, flouncy, flippant, frivolous and fluff-brained, but she is gentle, she is gracious, she is Godly and she is giving. You and I have the gift of femininity...the more womanly we are, the more manly men will be and the more God is glorified. Be women, be real women, be real women in obedience to God." 
~ Elisabeth Elliot 

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

a patch full of pics...

So, once again friends, I'm going to come on this blog of mine and rave about my wonderful roommates. Are you tired of hearing about them yet? Good, because I have a huge photo dump for you! Yay! To celebrate fall, the roommates and I headed out to a local pumpkin patch!

I love these girls with all my heart and they are truly amazing! They challenge me to be a "better Lauren". Sure, we've got quite a bit of estrogen stirring around our tiny little room but it is so nice to always have someone to talk to, pray for, or just have fun with! And trust me, we have plenty of fun.

Many nights have been full of laughter and we have already created so many fun memories. I'm glad you guys get to get a glimpse or all that through these pictures.

Happy Fall from the ladies of California #130!

"Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born or God and knows God." 
1 John 4:7

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

come rest, My beloved...

This morning I had an hour or two to kill before my Romans class. I have known about this little place on campus for a while now. Just a plain gazebo, nothing special.  I've always said to myself, "Man, I really need to spend some time over there." But walked on, went about my day, and continued to fade back into the stresses of school and life. But this morning, the Lord was calling me, ever so loudly. So I sat in silence and listened for the first time in a long time. 
And for nearly an hour I lost myself into the book of Song of Solomon. 

"Arise, my love, my beautiful one, and come away." 
Song of Solomon 2:10

"Let me see your face, let me hear your voice, for your voice is sweet, and your face is lovely." 
Song of Solomon 2:14

After reading those passages, I felt so comforted. My Lord and Savior wants to hear my voice again. He wants to see my face. He calls them lovely and sweet. 
I am His love and He has called me beautiful. In the stillness and in the quiet of that moment, the Lord whispered this words. 

come rest, My beloved. 

Those four words have been echoing in my head all day. But what do they mean? 

With 22 credits, I have plenty of homework to do at any point and time. Even now, as I type these words, assignments, lectures, and papers are running through my head. But I must stop. 

Today, I have felt such a peace. A kind of peace that I haven't felt in as long as I could remember. I wasn't constantly concerned about my deadlines or all of my personal expectations for myself. 

Ever since I have arrived here at bible college, I have been going non stop. Worship practice here, class there, dorm meeting now, chapel tomorrow is a little insane. I got sucked into the busyness  and never really have a chance to step back and enjoy. Enjoy fellowship with others, enjoy time with my Savior, enjoy my surroundings, enjoy anything! 

So, I can assure you I will spend much more time resting in the one who wants to hear my voice and calls me beloved. 

Sunday, October 13, 2013

where my ladies at...

Well friends, this past weekend has been a little rough. After a long 30 work shift Monday-Wednesday this week, I woke up on Friday with quite the cold. It was not the best weekend. But hey, I got to spend it in bed, with Jamba Juice watching definitely made it a bit more tolerable.

As I sat in my bed this weekend surrounded by tissues, sneezing, and coughing for hours, I realized how blessed I am to be surrounded by the women I am. These ladies will laugh with me, cry with me, take me to the grocery store at any hour of the day to get Swedish Fish, and even walk around Walmart at 8am to get tissues with me. (It kinda helps when 4 of your roommates are sick with you right?) I wish I had words to say how much I love this lades. So here are a few pictures just to show it...
Trip to BJ's! 

Yogurt makes us happy! #3ouncesfree

Photo-Booth Fun! 

We are a little crazy! 

Emily, my Jamba Juice buddy! 

Don't you wish your waitressing uniform was hot like mine? 

Our campus coffee shop is pretty hipster. 

Thursday, October 10, 2013

the words to speak...

the change of season may or may not have a huge role in my buzz of inspiration 
So guys, I've been the blogging bug. I makes me sad to think about how little I have blogged in the past few weeks. I truly have missed you guys and connecting with you! But with a waitressing job on campus, classes, and homework, it is nearly impossible to find time to type my thoughts away. But, ever so recently, I have fallen in love with blogging all over again. More specifically, writing in general.

It just calms my soul. I don't know what I would do if I couldn't express my thoughts, feeling, and experiences with you guys. No matter where this blog takes me, I'm thankful for all of you who have been so supportive since the very beginning! *Internet hugs*

With that being said, I continue to search and ask the Lord for the words to speak for any future works. "Lauren, what does that mean?"

Well ladies (and gentlemen), that means I want to write...a book. I can't tell you how long this desire has been in my heart. For as long as I could remember. But within the past weeks, the Lord has continually placed the opportunity into my thoughts. All I can do now is sit back, pray, and fervently ask the Lord for the words to speak.

For now though, I am promising myself that I will find time to write my thoughts here and on paper. I can't rob myself of the thing that makes my heart happy.

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

deeper than i could wander...

Let me walk upon the waters wherever You would call me 
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander 

This is my prayer. My hearts desire and all I long for. 

These past 43 days have been a whirlwind. I realized this as I took communion during our weekly Sunday Night Chapel. As I sang those words above, I thought of all the times since I have been here that I have doubted God. Doubted Him about how He will keep me safe, how I will be able to pay for next semester, etc. Every aspect of my life I have thought waay too long and hard about. And here I am saying that it needs to stop. 

Does anyone else feel sore? No, not like the "I-just-did-a-major-workout"sore. I mean spiritually sore. I have been strengthened by more scripture and biblical training in the past month and a half than I have in my entire life. Boy, am I exhausted. But in a totally amazing way. 

It is so easy here to loose sight of why I came. After spending hours working on a Romans paper or a word study, sometimes the last thing I want to spend more time in the Word. It really is the worst feeling! It's hard to go through a whole day of classes and work and not be spiritually exhausted. BUT, my God is the ultimate provider. He will give me the strength I need. It always seems that whenever I need strength the most, He always provides just enough to get through the day.

I must admit to you all, I haven't put a lot of trust in the Lord this month. Everything that has happened, every moment, every second guess, I have tried to figure it out on my own.  First off, when has that ever worked out? Second off, who I am I to not place 110% of my trust into my Lord. After all, He is the one that brought me here. He has placed me into every situation for a reason. Getting caught up on every detail will just stress me out. It is just not worth it because God knows exactly what He is doing.

If I have any faith or trust in Him at all, I must walk where He has called me. Only my dear Savior can lead me deeper then I could ever wander. Why would I want to just sit on the shore when He can take my hand and lead me to the waters? Can it be difficult, physically and spiritually exhausting? Yes. But ultimately He is breaking down my own selfish walls and lead me into experiences I never could on my own.